Digital consent: protecting kids in the digital age
Today’s children grow up in a world where every post, picture, and click leaves a lasting footprint and shapes our online identity. Just like adults, children have the right to control what traces they leave behind and to decide what their footprint and online identity will look like.
When our children are not old enough to do this themselves, it is our job as parents to make wise decisions on their behalf and protect them.
By the time kids have an online life of their own, parents play an important role in teaching them to practice consent and safeguard their privacy and digital footprint. Not just as rules, but as values and behavior based on empathy, respect, and personal boundaries.
This guide explains what digital consent is, why it matters, and how to practice it at home. You’ll find practical steps to teach children how to protect their privacy, respect others, and manage their digital footprint, from setting boundaries and creating family agreements to asking for permission before sharing photos.
Photos, videos, and comments can, with just a few clicks, travel far and be copied and spread far beyond where it was intended to. It can be hard to tell when it is okay to share or download something without clear, physical boundaries indicating what is yours and what is not.
We want our children to explore digital spaces with confidence, curiosity, and creativity. However, this calls for guidelines around empathy, respect, and boundaries. In other words, digitalconsent.
Consent is not just a legal issue or a set of rules. It’s about teaching children that their voices and boundaries matter and that privacy is a right.
Parents do this best by modelling this behavior themselves, for example, by respecting kids’ boundaries and asking if they want to be in our social media posts, or if they are okay with being recorded in a private moment.
This guide brings together practical advice and proven strategies to help families discuss consent and privacy with their children.
First, parents must learn what digital consent really means and why it is more important than ever today.
Making sure children respect consent is not about controlling or monitoring their online behavior. There is a much better way that is more effective and lasting. It’s about raising responsible digital citizens who know how to protect themselves, respect others, and build healthy online relationships.
Introduction to digital consent
The digital world is shaped by constant interaction. Communication often consists of sharing photos, messages, and other content. Everyone has easy access to anything that is uploaded or shared, even something that was meant to be private or only shared with a few.
With a few clicks, we can decide what story is told about us or someone else. Without respecting consent and boundaries, our own story and digital footprint would be out of our hands. This is why teaching about consent in the digital life has become just as important as teaching it offline.
How we are represented online can have lasting consequences, especially for young people. Even if the online representation is not accurate, it still reflects on who you are or want to be and shapes how other people see you.
Parents play a crucial role in teaching kids about their rights and respectful behavior towards others.The best way to do this is to show them what respectful behavior looks like and guide them through the right choices as they arise in their digital life.
When building trust, starting open conversations, being curious, and encouraging children to share what happens online, parents can be allowed into their digital lives.
Understanding what is okay to share and what is not can at times be difficult, especially for kids. First of all, there can be different rules and laws depending on where in the world you live that dictate when consent is needed.
In some countries, it’s not allowed to photograph other people in public, while in other places it’s okay as long as they are not shared.
There can also be nuances regarding whether consent is required, depending on what the photo is used for, for example, if it’s used for commercial purposes.
Additionally, it makes a difference what is in the picture. If it’s a close-up of someone's face, or a personal, intimate, or humiliating photo. The latter can be illegal, especially if it’s a photo of a minor.
At times, it can be hard to know what is allowed, especially when you see the wrong behavior practiced again and again online.
An example is the Umbrella Case in Denmark, where a group of teenagers passed around a sexually explicit video they received of two young teens. They didn’t understand that it was wrong, since they didn’t know the people in the video or record it themselves, and some hardly looked at it, but just passed it on to friends, just like they had received it.
However, sharing a sexually explicit video without consent from the victim, especially one of a minor, is a criminal offence. In the end, more than 1,000 young people were charged after sharing the video. Around 500 received a sentence that will affect their criminal record and future opportunities for years to come, while others were fined.
The case highlighted how important respecting privacy, consent, and boundaries is, and how serious the consequences can be for both victims and violators.
It highlights the need for teaching children that consent applies just as much in digital spaces as it does offline, and violating privacy and consent by sharing without permission can have life-changing consequences for both parties.
What is digital consent?
In the digital space, there aren't any natural borders that separate yours from mine. Everything we post can be downloaded, uploaded, shared, or copied with a click. Often, without being noticed by anyone. Many private situations can easily be recorded or photographed and shared in an instant.
Digital consent is the practice of respecting boundaries, privacy, and ownership in online spaces. Having this practice of consent in place ensures that everyone has the right to decide what is shared about them online.
Often, kids are not aware of their right to say no to their picture being shared online. However, being respected for your boundaries and right to say no to having something shared about you automatically makes you aware of other people's right to the same.
Those kids who experience being asked for consent and have a say in controlling their online presence will be more likely to ask others for permission to share and to respect a no.
It starts with how we interact with our children, if we ask before posting their photos, respect their right to privacy when filming, and demonstrate that their “no” is a valid response.
Parents can teach children to understand that others deserve the same respect.
In a digital world where boundaries are less visible, consent becomes a shared language of trust, safety, and respect.
Why digital consent matters more than ever
Digital consent matters more today than ever. Oversharing, pressure from peers, harmful requests, or blurred lines between public and private are some of the things kids face in a digital world where boundaries are not respected.
Teaching digital consent helps kids protect their privacy, recognize unsafe situations, and know their rights.
Parents can play an important role in setting and respecting boundaries. We can equip our children with skills that keep others safe and prevent exploitation, reduce conflict, and encourage responsible decision-making.
Key topics covered in this guide
This guide explores how to model consent as parents and how to discuss privacy and boundaries with our kids. You will also find useful tips on practical ways to practice consent in your daily life. Knowing this will protect both your child’s safety and their digital footprint.
The guide will also share valuable tips on how to prevent power struggles by creating family agreements and having honest conversations. This is the most effective way to implement new rules and habits to support digital consent and the privacy of everyone in the family.
Understanding digital consent
Before teaching children how to practice consent online, parents first need a clear understanding of what it means in a digital context. While consent offline is often visible and straightforward, the online world introduces new challenges.
The digital environment today consists of blurred boundaries, lasting digital footprints, and the fact that our digital devices allow us to record or photograph anyone and share online whenever we want.
The concept of consent is significant in this context, reminding us that just because we can share other people's content or photos, it doesn't mean we have the right to do so.
Definition and core principles
What is digital consent? Digital consent is the practice of giving and receiving permission to share content or information about someone elsein online spaces, where personal boundaries and privacy guidelines are less visible.
It covers activities such as sharing photos, joining group chats, posting content, or disclosing personal details. At its core, digital consent means that every individual, including children, has the right to decide over their online presence, including what information about them is shared and with whom it is shared.
What is the age of digital consent? ‘The age of digital consent’ refers to the age at which children can legally consent to how their personal data is collected and used online, without parental involvement. Depending on the country, this age is set between 13 and 16.
Below this age, platforms face strict limits. They must get parental consent before collecting or using children’s personal data, and they cannot use it for advertising or profiling. This is why many social media platforms set their minimum age at 13, since social media relies heavily on collecting and sharing user data.
However, digital consent is much more than that. In real life, children are exposed to digital decisions much earlier, and sometimes in situations where parents are not present to verify if information or content is safe to share.
As soon as kids receive their first phone and are allowed a digital social life, texts are sent, chats are created, photos are taken, and shared.
Without being aware of what is okay to share and what is not, this can go very wrong for both the kids sharing and those who have their photos shared.
Parents, therefore, need to guide and support their children long before they reach this threshold, ensuring they understand both their rights and responsibilities in digital spaces.
The principles are simple but powerful: respect privacy, recognize that “no” is always a valid response, and remember that consent must be freely given, not pressured or manipulated.
How digital consent differs from traditional consent
Traditional consent often relates to physical interactions, like borrowing an item, entering a space, or allowing physical contact. Digital consent, however, takes place in a borderless environment where content can be copied, shared, or stored indefinitely, often without the rightful owner even being aware.
A private photo, once shared, may travel far beyond its intended audience. A message might be misinterpreted when circulated without context. Photos can be taken and uploaded without knowledge.
This lack of natural boundaries makes digital consent uniquely challenging.
Children must therefore be equipped to recognize when someone else’s boundaries are at risk, and make it a habit to ask for permission and know when to respect a no.
They should know that digital consent is not optional. It is the foundation of respectful and safe online interactions.
The role of parents in setting standards for digital behavior
Parents are not only guardians of their children’s safety. They are also role models for their behavior, both online and offline. The way parents model consent in their own digital lives sets a standard for their kids that they most likely will copy.
By asking before posting a photo of their child or respecting their teenager’s wish not to be tagged, parents can show an example of how to be respectful of people's rights and boundaries online.
A way to create a structure or framework around the habits and values we want our kids to have online is by establishing family values and agreements. This is an excellent way to agree on clear boundaries around device use.
The best way to reach an agreement is by creating a safe space for open conversations where everyone feels heard and their opinions valued.
Why digital consent is crucial for families
There is a direct link between the concept of digital consent and children’s safety and relationships. In a world where private content, posts, and messages are easily shared and at risk of being taken out of context, ending up in the wrong hands, we need to establish safe habits around our digital interactions.
Children need guidance to understand their rights and responsibilities in this matter, and parents play a central role in this process. When we teach kids how to protect their own and others' privacy and recognize unsafe situations, we create a foundation for safe and healthy digital lives.
When parents violate consent
Many proud parents share personal moments on social media about their children. Some share funny stories or photo documentation of important events and milestones. However, we often forget to ask our kids if they are okay with this exposure.
We often forget they have the right to decide if they want to be filmed, tagged, and have their photos shared, and ultimately how they are represented online and how their digital footprint is formed. They might not care when they are 2 or 5 years old, but they might when they are 15 and the family photo album is publicly available on social media.
How many of us are not guilty of sharing photos of our kids from the moment they are born? Posting videos of them being sad, cute, silly, etc. We forget to consider that everything that goes online stays online, and we never know where it ends up or who is watching.
We also forget to consider whether our kids are comfortable with having their childhood documented online and shared with strangers. They might not feel good about having their potty training or how they cried over not getting ice cream being on public display when they are older.
Some parents even set up planned scenarios to use their children in challenges, pranks, or other social media posts to get views and likes. An example that has been trending on social media is telling your children you ate all their Halloween candy and then filming their shock and tears.
Other social media trends include secretly recording conversations or activities to post them for attention.
Without knowing it, parents often violate their children's right to decide what is posted about them, and in doing so, teach them that boundaries and consent don’t matter. Nothing teaches respect like being treated respectfully yourself.
If we want to teach our children to respect others, we have to start with the habits and values we teach at home.
Protecting children’s privacy in the digital age
In today’s digital world, apps, games, and platforms are constantly collecting personal data. The data we share isn’t only what we post or upload, but also our behavior, preferences, and the information we provide when signing up. This includes children, too.
Laws such as the U.S. Children’s Online Privacy Protection Act(COPPA) and the EU’s General Data Protection Regulation (GDPR) set strict rules on how children’s data can be collected and used. They require parental consent before companies collect personal information from children and ensure that this data is handled securely.
The goal is to protect children from being unfairly targeted by companies, to keep their personal information safer in case of security breaches, and to give families more control over their privacy online.
Key laws parents should know (COPPA, GDPR-Kids)
In the United States, COPPA requires websites and online services directed at children under 13, or those that knowingly collect data from children under 13, to obtain verifiable parental consent before gathering personal information. It also gives parents the right to review and delete their child’s data and restricts companies from collecting more information than necessary.
In Europe, GDPR includes special provisions for children. Under Article 8, children under a certain age (set between 13 and 16, depending on the country) need parental authorization for their personal data to be processed. This is often referred to as the “age of digital consent”. These laws emphasize that children’s privacy deserves stronger protections than adults’.
Building trust and respect in online spaces
While these legal frameworks are important, consent is not only about privacy. It is just as much about trust, respect, and empathy, and is the foundation of healthy relationships and interactions online.It's the recipe forhow to build trust in online conversations and other digital interactions.
By implementing habits of practicing consent, we can trust that someone will ask before tagging a photo or will delete a picture that makes us uncomfortable.
We can trust that boundaries are respected and photos will not be taken in secret and shared with strangers or posted publicly. Consent protects our legal rights, our online identity, and our safety.
Preventing risks like exploitation and data misuse
Without clear guidance on consent and privacy, children are vulnerable to serious risks. Exploitation often begins when someone pressures a child to share information or images.
Children who don’t fully understand the consequences or how wrong it is to pressure someone for consent are especially vulnerable in these situations.
Both online predators and scammers use this type of technique to pressure or trick the victim into consent.
Data misuse happens when private details are collected, copied, or spread without consent. Teaching children that it is always okay to say “no,” to leave a conversation, or to block and report someone provides them with tools to stay safe. Children who are aware of this have the confidence to set boundaries online and protect themselves from harm.
Common violations of digital consent
Unfortunately, violations of digital consent are common, and they can have lasting effects on children’s safety, well-being, and relationships. Digital consent is about protecting dignity and staying safe in a digital world that doesn’t forget.
By understanding where safety breaches often happen and when consent is violated, parents can take steps to prevent this and educate children toward safer online habits.
Unauthorized sharing of photos and videos
One of the most frequent violations is sharing images without asking first. This can happen if a child receives a photo of someone else and passes it on without considering whether it’s okay or if the person in the picture is aware of it and has consented.
It also often happens that well-meaning relatives or parents upload photos of their children without considering the child’s right to control their online presence. The images and the reactions and comments they generate can follow them for years to come, and maybe spread beyond the intended audience.
They become part of a digital footprint that lasts into adulthood, which the child might not be comfortable with.
Sharenting
“Sharenting”, the combination of sharing and parenting, is a term that describes parents who continuously share information and images of their children online. Often, it is done out of a need to share the joy, pride, and love for their children; however, it has a catch to it.
It is also a way to unintentionally violate children's right to give consent and keep their privacy.
While sharing milestones may feel natural, it exposes children’s private lives to audiences they did not choose.
Not everyone will be comfortable having their potty training, emotional tantrums, or private moments at home published on social media for everyone to see and refer to as they grow up.
Involving children in decisions about what gets posted about them online and avoiding posting in public online spaces when kids are too young to make that decision helps build trust and teaches them that their opinions, privacy, and boundaries matter.
Being filmed or photographed without consent
Being secretly recorded or photographed strips someone of their sense of safety and autonomy.
Even if intended as a joke, the hidden harm is real. When it happens to kids, it teaches them that their privacy is not guaranteed.
Parents can model respect by considering their children's feelings and boundaries when filming or photographing, and by encouraging their kids to do the same for others.
We often wonder why today's teens are obsessed with perfection and appearance compared to previous generations. Considering the risks of exposure and documentation ingrained in every situation and moment of their day, it’s not so surprising.
On social media, they witness people being exposed and receiving hurtful comments and negative attention daily.
Oversharing on social media and its consequences
Oversharing can blur the lines between public and private life. Posting sensitive details such as location, school information, or daily routines can expose children to strangers with harmful intentions.
It can also create long-term consequences, as once something is posted, it is nearly impossible to erase if it has been shared or copied by others.
Children might not realize the level of exposure and the consequences when sharing something online. It can feel like a false sense of safety and protection when sitting at home behind a screen, not being aware of the audience on the other side and how far their posts can reach.
Additionally, others might aim for exactly that, hoping their posts go viral in an attempt at global attention and recognition. However, not considering what the moments of viral attention will do for their online identity in the future.
Scams and fraud – How hackers use personal data
Personal data hacking is when our personal information ends up in the wrong hands. Sometimes hackers try to obtain this information through scams. Sometimes it happens when personal data is shared without consent or consideration, making it easier for scammers or predators to exploit.
Hackers may use names, birthdays, or photos to create fake profiles, manipulate accounts, guess passwords, or target children with fraudulent requests.
Teaching children what is okay to share and in which situations is important. Even if you don’t share something publicly online, it is still a risk to reveal sensitive information in a private message to the wrong person.
Digital footprint and digital consent
Every action we take online contributes to our digital footprint. Every click, photo, post, and comment we make online leaves small traces showing we have been there. Most of it is not visible to us but can be collected as data, providing information about our preferences, location, and online activities.
Other footprints are visible to other users, like the photos we post, the messages we send, and the comments we write. It all reflects back on us and tells a story about who we are. Often, for people we don’t know, that online representation of us is all they see and know.
What is a digital footprint and why it matters
What is digital footprint? A digital footprint is the sum of all information about a person that exists online, both created by themselves and by others. This can include social media updates, shared photos, and online comments. It can also include information collected by apps and websites in the background, such as your search history, websites you visit, and even your physical location and movements through the day.
A footprint matters because once information is shared, it is difficult, and at times even impossible to erase. Employers, schools, or peers may access it years later. In legal matters, authorities can trace back previous locations and erased messages.
Young people might not be aware of the trail of information they leave behind online and the future consequences it can have. This footprint and the online identity they create can shape how others perceive them today and even influence opportunities in the future.
Teaching children about digital consent plays a vital role in helping them understand the importance of their digital footprint, how to protect it, and why thoughtful choices matter.
By teaching children to be aware of what is shared in their name and to build responsible digital habits, parents can ensure their children’s online presence reflects respect, safety, and integrity.
How parents influence a child’s digital identity
Parents significantly shape their child’s digital identity long before the child is old enough to manage it themselves. Sharing baby photos, school achievements, or funny stories online creates a permanent record.
While often well-intentioned, this content becomes part of the child’s online identity without their consent. As parents, we set the standard for whether our child learns that their privacy is respected. Asking permission before posting, or involving children in the decision, models healthy digital consent and teaches them that their voice matters.
Teaching kids to manage their online presence responsibly
There are a few important things parents can teach kids about how to manage online presence.
As children grow, they need tools to manage their own digital identity. Parents can teach them to pause before sharing, to respect others’ privacy, and to understand that “delete” does not always mean that something is completely gone.
We can encourage them to see their online presence as part of their reputation. What they post should reflect the values they want to be known for, and the photos they think are cool today, they might think differently about when they are older.
Role-playing scenarios, such as how to respond if asked to share a private photo or how to handle hurtful comments, help children practice making safe and respectful choices and understand consequences.
Many families have benefited from using conversation starters, prompting them to discuss realistic situations or dilemmas and reflect on how to handle these challenging and sometimes complex scenarios.
Privacy and safety measures for parents
The basics of protecting children’s online privacy include using the available tools and settings to minimize risks. When kids start using online devices, parents must take an active role in adjusting privacy settings and understanding how their data is collected to create a safer environment for their children to explore.
Setting privacy controls on social platforms
Social media platforms and apps are often set to public sharing by default, which can expose children to strangers or unwanted attention. Parents should review and adjust privacy settings continuously as needed.
Areas in need of data privacy controls include limiting who can view posts, controlling who can send friend requests, and managing tagging or location-sharing features.
Understanding cookie consent and online tracking
Cookies can be seen as a type of online tracking system. Many websites and apps track behavior through cookies and other tools, often collecting far more information than children and even most adults realize.
Cookie consent banners are now common in many regions, but they can be confusing to younger users. Some cookies are necessary for the website to function properly, while others are only there to collect data for marketing.
Parents should explain that accepting cookies often means allowing companies to track browsing habits and build advertising profiles. Cookies can also store personal information and habits online, assisting with easy access to frequently used websites, and when entering details for signups, etc.
Teaching children to decline unnecessary cookies or to use browsers with stronger privacy settings empowers them to manage how much of their digital activity is monitored.
Best practices for protecting personal and family data
A few good habits for how to protect personal data online go a long way toward protecting privacy and personal information.
- Use strong, unique passwords for each account, and never share them with anyone.
- Consider a password manager for added security.
- Enable two-factor authentication whenever possible to reduce the risk of unauthorized access. Avoid oversharing personal details such as addresses, school information, or daily routines online.
- Regularly update software and apps to protect against vulnerabilities.
However, most importantly, talk with children about why these ways to protect personal data matter: protecting family data isn’t about secrecy, but about keeping everyone safe from scams, fraud, and misuse.
Protecting children's privacy goes far beyond setting passwords and keeping them secret. It means helping children understand what information and content should stay private and why.
Key takeaways for how to teach about privacy and safety:
- Limit personal details: Teach kids never to share full names, birthdays, school, or addresses without checking first.
- Think before posting: Ask “Would I be okay if this were public or permanent?”
- Use privacy settings together: Show how to control who can see their information.
- Review regularly: Go back over old posts and accounts to make sure they still reflect what they want.
- Be cautious with sensitive info: Avoid posting locations, routines, or identifying details.
- Spot risks: Explain how scammers use small details to build fake profiles or access accounts.
- Model mindful sharing: Parents should demonstrate careful, limited sharing in their own posts.
- Family digital agreement: Write rules together so privacy habits feel fair and shared.
Practicing digital consent at home
Digital consent becomes meaningful for children when it’s lived out and put to use in everyday family life. Parents can create an environment of trust and respect by setting clear agreements, modeling consent through their own behavior, and encouraging children to think critically about their actions online.
When parents model respect by asking before posting a child’s photo, or by listening when a child says “no,” they teach that boundaries matter.
Creating a family digital agreement
A family digital agreement is a practical way to set boundaries and expectations around technology use. It can either be done by
It can either be done by filling out a digital agreement form or coming up with all the details together.
By involving children in drafting the agreement, parents give them a sense of responsibility and ownership. The agreement should cover topics like screen time, privacy rules, and what is safe to share online.
When children help shape the rules, they are more likely to respect and follow them, and parents can refer back to the agreement as a shared standard and a reminder.
Asking before posting – respecting boundaries
One of the most effective ways to teach digital consent is by asking your child before sharing their photos or achievements online. This not only respects their privacy but also teaches them about boundaries and their right to say no.
Asking if someone wants to be in a photo, or giving the option to move out of the way before taking it, is another way of showing respect. Children who experience being asked for permission themselves are more likely to ask others before posting content or taking photos, and respect a no.
How to teach kids about digital consent
Children learn best through practice. By taking an active interest and staying involved in their child’s online interactions, parents can help spot situations where consent is important.
- Asking before adding someone to a group or group chat
- Checking before tagging a friend
- Saying “no” when something feels uncomfortable
- Asking before sharing photos of someone
- Asking if someone is okay with being recorded or photographed
Role-playing scenarios are another way to teach that helps children prepare for real-life digital situations, giving them the confidence to assert their boundaries and respect others’.
Encouraging empathy and digital respect in children
Consent is deeply connected to empathy and respect. Understanding how words, images, or actions may affect another person is the basis of why consent matters.
How to encourage empathy
Encouraging empathy by making sure children pause and think before posting teaches them that being respectful online is just as important as it is offline. Over time, this builds a digital culture where consent, empathy, and respect go hand in hand.
Key takeaways for teaching children consent:
- Ask first: Always ask before sharing photos, videos, or milestones of your child, and encourage them to do the same for others.
- Right to say no: Teach kids they can refuse being filmed, photographed, or tagged, and that others deserve the same respect.
- No secret recordings: Explain how hidden photos or videos damage trust and safety.
- Respect in daily life: Practice asking permission before adding someone to a group chat, tagging them, or sharing their content.
- Boundaries online: Respect when someone doesn’t want frequent calls, texts, or location sharing.
- Credit creativity: Ask before reposting or using someone else’s art, video, or content, and give credit if they agree.
- Practice scenarios: Role-play situations like being asked to share a private photo, so kids know how to respond.
- Reflect openly: Discuss real-life posts or comments and ask how they might make others feel.
Final thoughts on digital consent
Teaching digital consent is not a single conversation. It is an ongoing practice of respect, empathy, and establishing boundaries. As children grow, their digital lives expand, and so do the challenges and need for support and guidance.
Parents who model respect, set clear agreements, actively engage in their children's online life, and encourage open dialogue provide the best foundation for their children to thrive in an online world that often tests boundaries.
Parenting in the digital age means staying informed and adaptable. Resources such as the Raising Digital Citizens Conversation Cards create a simple framework for all the important areas families must know about, and make difficult topics easy to discuss.
Guides on creating a family digital agreement provide structure for building safe, healthy online habits. By combining knowledge with everyday practice, parents can give their children the tools to not only stay safe but also build positive, respectful digital lives.
Final action steps for parents on how to raise digital citizens:
- Model consent and privacy yourself: Ask before posting about your child or others, and openly reflect on what information is better not shared online.
- Create agreements together: Build family digital rules collaboratively, so everyone feels responsible.
- Keep dialogue open: Ask questions, listen with interest and curiosity and without judgment, and stay actively engaged in your child’s digital world.
- Teach practical skills: Review privacy settings, role-play online scenarios, and practice saying “no.”
- Focus on empathy: Encourage reflection on how online actions affect others, turning consent into a foundation for kindness.
